城市女该不该嫁农村男

城市女该不该嫁农村男 Should a city woman marry a country man? The girl said in a post city woman should not marry rural male lead million netizen debate Tianya Chongqing on the title "do not marry the rural people" of the post, in the evening of 22 after opening paste, attracting tens of thousands of netizens onlookers. The post leads to a heated discussion about "Phoenix man" in the city, and points out that urban women should not marry rural men from the aspects of life concept, economic problems, parents' health and female effects. In the replies of support and opposition, more netizens objected to the view that the rural environment is no worse than that of the city, and that the idea of "not marrying the rural people" does not hold water. Today, Zhang Xiaoan, an associate professor of psychology at the Chongqing Normal University, said in an interview with the Hualong network reporter that the most important thing about marriage is that it is wise to choose a spouse before marriage, and to be wise after marriage. Tianya Chongqing on the title "do not marry the rural people" of the post, in the evening of 22 after opening paste, attracting tens of thousands of netizens onlookers. The post leads to a heated discussion about "Phoenix man" in the city, and points out that urban women should not marry rural men from the aspects of life concept, economic problems, parents' health and female effects. In the replies of support and opposition, more netizens objected to the view that the rural environment is no worse than that of the city, and that the idea of "not marrying the rural people" does not hold water. Today, Zhang Xiaoan, an associate professor of psychology at the Chongqing Normal University, said in an interview with the Hualong network reporter that the most important thing about marriage is that it is wise to choose a spouse before marriage, and to be wise after marriage. Girls posted online Phoenix man four sins cited onlookers ID, "I'm not Ninja 2010", is in the midst of a marriage with a "rural born, urban development" man, posting on the edge of the conflict in his marriage. The landlord to marriage is hard to communicate; wage subsidies country; parents have no health insurance; patriarchal ideology serious "four sins" as an excuse to advise you not to marry the rural people. Subsequently, the landlord also added "ten Phoenix men character", "Nineteen Phoenix men's fault", causing hot net friend. The approver replies that both sides in the marriage, "equal" is very important, in order to avoid the marriage conflicts, women should avoid city from countryside and male marriage. More netizens cited social news, supporting the outcome of such marriages. The opposition, more rational users analyze the landlord made Overgeneralization mistakes in the post, that even part of the "Phoenix man" has such shortcomings, is not to say that all this is true of men from the countryside, you can not kill a stick; it was also said that the marriage is to take the initiative to assume responsibility important, cannot be expected to only bring benefits for themselves, without any cost to himself in marriage. Some netizens think this "don't marry the rural people" point of view, the crux of the problem is money, even thought that the landlord is worship vanity, I want to marry a rich man, to persuade them to divorce, no more words. Online survey, independent women, spouse choice, more rational Reporters found that, for some time now, such topics in the forum is very hot. The reporter investigated dozens of female netizens in the city on the Internet, asking them for their views on "don't marry the country". Most netizens said that there were indeed some "men who grew up in the countryside and struggled in the city" who had the trait of "Phoenix man", but this does not mean that all people with similar trajectories have these problems. A netizen surnamed Zhang's views represent the majority of women surveyed thought. She believes that "married to the rural people" can be considered, but the other party can not be a "Phoenix man."". She said that personality problems such as big male chauvinism, many people in the city also have. Blindly "do not marry rural people" can not let oneself marry better, but can reduce one's choice face instead. Chen netizens said that marriage should hope for the best, for coming. If we value each other's simplicity, concentration, kindness and so on, Then also accept the other side of the family, but also bear the responsibility of the other side of the family. Just before marriage, the two sides should reach a certain consensus, not a heat before marriage, and after marriage can not stand. There are also netizens for criticism of the landlord, money worship, women tend to mate in different directions, everyone values different. Just as the "rural man" is equivalent to "Phoenix man", it is simple and crude, and it is improper to simply "do not want to marry the rural people" simply to induce money worship. Many choices for women are the product of a competitive society, and women lack a sense of security. They put a lot of demands on their spouse to reduce the possible difficulties and ensure the stability of life in the future rather than simply show off their vanity. Expert analysis, "Phoenix men" psychological emphasis on premarital rational spouse, after marriage wisdom contradiction The reporter interviewed Zhang Xiaoan, an associate professor of Applied Psychology at the school of Educational Sciences of Chongqing Normal University. Zhang said that for the "Phoenix man" and its family mentality is reasonable, should be empathy, to be understood, but should not be fully accepted. Zhang Xiaoan pointed out that if the "Phoenix man" a single person, to all return home but small family established no ground for blame, and they not only have the responsibility of parents and relatives, but also have the responsibility for his wife, to jointly assume the family expenses, but also to the premise of mutual respect, respect for the woman the basic living habits and individual dignity. Zhang Xiaoan said, not to measure their ability to supply excessive help, or for family demands he will fall, not only "delegate to fish" the root cause, it will hurt the person closest to me. These problems can not be solved only by the woman's repeated understanding, both sides should realize the problem, and skilled initiative to attack and solve. Zhang Xiaoan also stressed that the "rural man" = "Phoenix man" this view is completely wrong. She pointed out that "Phoenix man" of all kinds of shortcomings, in the final analysis, is a inferiority complex, the self as a social vulnerable family, in the successful transformation of their own situation, inferiority complex distortion of the results. She said, this mentality in the city people who in fact are not uncommon, but some do not have this inferiority of the rural family, many people do not want to with the children to enjoy, also be to continuously supply "children pollution-free food" in the country, with their honest, kind, hard-working virtue infection the restless city people. Being able to become a family with such a rural person is the most fortunate thing for many city girls. Zhang Xiaoan said, the modern family marriage life contradiction is more, premarital women should polish their eyes, as far as possible comprehensive understanding of each other's personality characteristics, family background. On the network every kind of story, can let you have a mental preparation to observe each other in many aspects, clear whether they can face the possible problems, and through the story of others, help yourself thinking, the solution of the problem, rather than lead you in mate selection bias. Zhang Xiaoan concluded that we are inappropriate for the rural people's prejudices, rational choice is fundamental, even after marriage encounter such problems, also should not easily give up, positive and effective communication, when necessary to help the professionals is a way to solve the problem.