如何教育4-8岁的孩子

如何教育4-8岁的孩子 孩子一岁时，抢小朋友的玩具，因为他以为凡是看见的就是自己的;两岁时，他不肯让别人玩他的小车，因为他不懂分享;三岁时，他常把“不”挂在嘴边，因为他要自己“做主”。不过到了四岁，该开始设立更严格的规则，让他知道，什么是对，什么是错，什么是可以做的，什么不可以。 孩子四岁是道坎, 我们普遍认为美国人对孩子更宽松，但最近一次调查中，80,的受访者认为现在的父母对孩子过于放任自流，40%的人希望自己还能管得更“紧”一点。 更严格的行为规则将随着孩子年龄的增长逐渐增多。 我们对孩子已经越来越理解和尊重，对他们的态度越来越宽容和开通。我们不再为孩子决定一切，而是为他们提供自主选择的机会;让孩子们有章可循、学会承担明确的行为责任会更好。没有纪律约束的孩子会变得过分关注自我，自私自利，而且不快乐——还会使周围的人也苦不堪言。 有的学者也通过研究发现，父母既满怀关爱又不失权威，对孩子既支持又限制，其教育的孩子往往学习出色，社交顺利，且自我感觉良好，总体来说也比要么过于宽松、要么过于严厉的父母所教育的小孩更为快乐。 父母们为什么更愿意对孩子宽松一点儿, 父母们对孩子的情绪十分敏感，担心教训孩子或过分频繁地说“不”，都会给他们造成心灵创伤。此外，如今的爸爸妈妈们往往十分珍视与孩子之间关系，希望受子女喜爱和尊敬。很多人似乎很难接受这一事实:一旦attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 成为家长，有时难免会不得人心。另外，最后的原因或许很简单:我们之所以娇惯孩子，完全是由于时间太少的缘故。毕竟，大部分母亲是职业女性，全职妈妈们也比以往任何时候都忙，谁又愿意把如此有限的时间花在对孩子明令禁止、实施惩罚上面, 然而调查发现，孩子不守规矩的时间越长，家长就会越来越听之任之，而这对任何一方都有害无益。举个例子，有一位母亲要她6岁的儿子去清理他自己的房间。可小孩不听话，吵吵闹闹的就是不干。如此对峙的局面当然令人不快，这位母亲只好不再提及此事，以求得安宁。但是她的行为实际上是在告诉孩子，只要他胡闹下去，他就能为所欲为。就这样，孩子们学会了怎样让大人无可奈何。 教养4岁孩子的五技巧 按照孩子的发展规律，他们在4岁以前还不了解规则和行为后果之间的联系。从4岁起，我们就可以加强纪律。 1.制定规则 对4岁及更大的孩子，我们可以针对他们最令人头疼的行为现，诸如和小朋友打架啦，说话粗鲁无礼啦，制定一份规则。育儿专家建议，对于4~8岁的孩子可以制定不超过5条的规则。 2.确定违规的后果 父母要清清楚楚地写明，如果违反规则，将有怎样的后果，比如说短时期内不再享受某些“好处”。(选择孩子最喜欢的活动作为“好处”，如出外游玩，请朋友上家里来，或者在临睡前看影碟。)一旦孩子违规时，立即贯彻行为后果。这个时候，无需警告，不用讨价还价，也没有第二次机会。attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 如果小家伙认为有商量的余地，他们可就不大会把你的规则当真了。 3.做好反反复复重申规则的准备 研究学龄前儿童的教育专家说:“在儿童这个年龄段，父母要想他们听话去做某事，或许得说上个百八十遍才行。” 4.规则要公平合理 我们要了解各年龄段的相应特点，以保持合理的期望。如果你4岁的儿子总是在饭桌旁坐不住，你就要知道，通常6岁的孩子会比4岁的时候更加能够“坐得住”，而等到8岁，他们的表现还会要好很多。 5.面对孩子违规的行为，家长的反应要言行一致，平静迅速 有些家长往往空发号令，光口头嚷着要怎么怎么样，譬如，“不准那样～”或者“叫你别干，我说话算话的～”但从来都不落实到真正的行动上。要记住老话——行动比言语更有力。 家长应该遵守的三个原则 不论你想将自己的管教技巧作微调还是整修，以下几个点子都可以帮你更坚决地贯彻行动。 安心拒绝 如果孩子苦苦央求，呜呜抱怨，胡搅蛮缠，软磨硬泡，总让你禁不住心软——“就这一次吧”，你的孩子就会断定，当妈妈说“不”时，其实意味着“还有机会”。然而请记住，以长远的眼光看来，妥协是有害的。一旦说了“不”，就一定要坚持。 如果孩子求你买一件你不想给他的东西，譬如含暴力的电脑游戏，或者晚饭前吃的糖块，你得说“不”，然后解释为何拒绝他。一旦你给出了attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 解释，就别再讨价还价，谈判协商，甚至放弃刚才的主张。你要做的只不过是设下规则。你要传达给孩子的信息是——你是家长，有些事情你说了算。 选择措辞 “公平”和“信用”这类词对孩子很管用，我们可以好好利用这一点。例如，当6岁的儿子坚决不肯清理桌子时，你可以说:“大家都为打扫房间出了力，你不干你那份活儿，不公平。”或者提前警告，对你5岁的女儿说:“你打算啥时候把玩具收好啊,”如果她说晚饭后会做，却没有执行，你可以直截了当地指出:“你没守信用～说好了要做的，现在要说到做到。” 另一个巧点子就是表示惊讶。当孩子胡闹时，父母往往会说:“又来了”或者“你老改不了～”然而更好的方式是表现出不解和惊讶——尽管这可能需要奥斯卡明星级的演技。你可以说“你最近表现好多了，我可真没想到你会打小朋友～我知道你喜欢小明，你心里肯定不想这么做的。” 适可而止 纪律严明并不意味着苛责甚至虐待。父母不管是制定规则还是实施惩罚，都应该心平气和，饱含关爱，注意别胁迫和恐吓孩子。 惩罚也不要过分。别老想着“该怎样才能教训教训这小子,”多想想怎样能帮助孩子达到你的期望。说到底，有效的纪律还是为孩子自己好:如果他现在对简单的规则——如“不打妹妹”或“说真话”——都置之不理，他怎么能学会在将来与人打交道时尊重朋友、坦诚待人,记住，纪律严明的目标不是权力与控制，而仅仅是为了教会孩子如何在生活中有所成attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 就。 怎样处罚4岁的孩子 1、规劝 :与同伴吵架、抢夺玩具„„ 方式:先放下手边的工作，并走到孩子身旁，让孩子知道你正在注意和关注;然后询问孩子争执、吵架的原因，并耐心听完孩子的想法;灌输孩子打人、抢夺是不正确的行为和观念，并要求孩子学习说“请、谢谢、对不起”。 建议:勿以很大声音去压住或威胁孩子;勿直接将孩子拉开，然后大声训斥孩子不是;言语间避免伤孩子的自尊心。 2、打手心 案例:打架、乱丢东西„„ 方式:用报纸制作一纸棒，外观可包上一层装纸;赋予它一个名称，如警惕棒、陈家棒„„;放在固定的地方作为警惕。 建议:在心情好的时候制作，可与孩子一起讨论制作警惕棒的原因;处罚孩子时，先让他说出自己错在什么地方;提醒处罚的原因;注意安全问，打的部位以手心、屁股为主，其他部位则应避免。 3、罚坐 案例:吵闹不休、吵架„„ 方式:在处罚区上摆上软垫或一张椅子，可取个名字;准备闹钟或时钟，计时处罚时间。 attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 建议:处罚地点不正对大门、不在太明显地方;限制处罚时间，或让孩子讲处罚多久的时间;处罚完后，让孩子说出今天被处罚的原因。 4、帮忙做家务 案例:乱画，乱丢东西、玩具„„ 方式:准备一条抹布、扫把、盆子等清洁用具，让孩子学习清理和养成整洁的习惯。 建议:父母应随时注意孩子的安全;较小的幼儿可由父母一起带领做家事;训练孩子养成物归原处的习惯;询问孩子在帮忙家事时学习到什么。 5、画画 案例:喜欢骂人、抓人、踢人、咬人等小动作。 方式:依家庭的情况，在固定处摆放一张小桌子(此处罚桌最好不要是平常使用到的书桌、餐桌、客桌等，以免孩子日后使用到这些桌子时，会产生害怕、恐惧的心理);准备一本画册及颜色不同的画笔，让孩子画出、写出心中的想法。 建议:当孩子有受伤时，先处理受伤部位再处罚;让孩子将发生的时间和做错的事情画下来;大人先控制自己的情绪，可从孩子的画中了解到，孩子犯错的心理想法;此为艺术治疗法，较不会伤害到孩子自尊心。 6、罚站 案例:故意从高处往下跳，车上跑跑跳跳。 方式:在家中规划一个处罚区，可取个名字，地点以靠墙壁、不正对大门为主;地上铺上软垫;准备一个时钟或闹钟，计时孩子处罚的时间。 建议:处罚地点不宜太明显或正对大门，以免伤及孩子自尊;与孩子讲attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 处罚时间不宜太久，否则会造成孩子更顽皮的反效果;视孩子的高度来决定垫子高度;处罚完后，询问孩子被处罚原因，让孩子自己知道做错的原因。 7、看书、写字 案例:暴力倾向、说谎、顺手牵羊„„ 方式:选择固定处罚区铺上软垫或摆放小桌子;在处罚区里面放铅笔、画纸、彩色笔、故事书、色纸„„;让孩子自己先写字或看书，化解孩子愤怒的情绪。 建议:当不能马上放下的工作时，可先叫孩子到处罚区去反省;别怒斥孩子的不是，与孩子先隔离，缓和彼此的情绪;等情绪平复后，询问孩子犯错的动机。 8、没收心爱的东西 案例:吵闹不休、乱丢东西、不收玩具„„ 方式:将孩子乱丢的物品予以没收，作为惩罚。 建议:先放下手边的工作，并走到孩子身旁，让孩子知道妈妈正在注意和关注;告诉孩子将乱丢的物品收好、停止吵闹，否则将有所处罚;让孩子说出为什么犯错，和妈妈生气的原因。 9、排豆子 案例:针对耐心不足，乱丢东西等情况。 方式:准备一个盒子、盘子，里面有红色、绿色等彩色的珠，几个塑料罐子;让孩子在处罚桌上，将各种颜色的珠，摆放在正确位置。 建议:如果孩子本身很叛逆，视情况针对孩子修改来处理，可先罚站、罚坐再做处罚;此目的在训练孩子养成物归原处的习惯;可训练手眼协调、attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability 分辨能力;完成后，让孩子知道被处罚的原因。 10、禁止某些权利、要求 案例:不爱刷牙、挑食、乱丢东西„„ 方式:将孩子爱吃、爱玩的东西暂时禁止碰触，作为惩罚。 建议:不以威胁、愤怒的态度大声对孩子说;让孩子知道禁止这些权利的原因，当孩子日后表现佳时，恢复其权利 把握原则、控制情绪 此外，专家也表示，孩子成长过程当中，难免都会犯错，无论是无心的或是故意的，当父母在处罚孩子时，还需注意一些事情，以免造成不良的后遗症。 1、安全问题，处罚物品的材质避免过于坚硬; 2、控制自己的情绪反应; 3、处罚的地点应选择不明显、不正对大门地方，以免伤到孩子自尊心; 4、注意措词、语气，勿以威胁、恐吓的话语对孩子说; 5、处罚内容需彻底执行，不宽容、妥协; 6、处罚后，安抚孩子，让他知道父母对他的关心和关爱。 attention to improving the quality and efficiency of development and pay more attention to security and reform the people's livelihood, more focus on maintaining social harmony and stability, and promote the development of township economy in a better and faster, create a new normal XX development and lay a more solid foundation for XX build a well-off society. Completed tasks this year, we must always pay special attention to the primary task of development. XX weak economic base, low levels of development, economic construction is the Center, we have to create conditions for faster economic development, accumulating more wealth, better people's lives. Effort should be made to this year's economic growth, revenue growth, people have maintained a high rate of income growth, GDP growth of more than 15 per cent respectively. Always grasp the fundamental impetus for reform. We are now "no soldiers behind" many indicators ranked in the bottom of the county from getting bigger. Only by going all out to hard work, hard work, innovation, reform does not adapt to institutional mechanisms, practices, it is possible to change the face of XX poor, into a well-off society together with people across the country. We want to break the old patterns of thinking, methods and organization of work, bravely and boldly into, making full use of all the advantages, comprehensive reforms, to make all its vitality for development impulse, let full play to all sources of wealth creation. Should always stability