演讲如何让压力成为你的朋友

KellyMcGonigal:Howtomakestressyourfriend.Ihaveaconfessiontomake,Butfirst,Iwantyoutomakealittleconfessiontome.Inthepastyear,Iwantyoutojustraiseyourhandifyou’veexperiencedrelativelylittlestress.AnyoneHowaboutamoderateamountofstressWhohasexperiencedalotofstressMetoo.Butthatisnotmyconfession.Myconfessionisthis:Iamahealthpsychologistandmymissionistohelppeoplebehappierandhealthier.ButIfearthatsomethingI’vebeenteachingforthelast10yearsisdoingmoreharmthangood,andithastodowithstress.ForyearsI’vebeenteachingpeople,stressmakesyousick.Itincreasestheriskofeverythingfromthecommoncoldtocardiovasclardisease.Basically,I’veturnedstressintotheenemy.ButIhavechangedmymindaboutstress,andtoday,Iwanttochangeyours.Letmestartwiththestudythatmademerethinkmywholeapproachtostress.Thisstudytracked30,000adultsintheUnitedStatesforeightyears,andtheystartedbyaskingpeople,“Howmuchstresshaveyouexperiencedinthelastyear”Theyalsoasked,“Doyoubelievethatstressisharmfulforyourhealth”Andthentheyusedpublicdeathrecordstofindoutwhodied.Okay!SomebadnewsfirstPeoplewhoexperiencedalotofstressinthepreviousyearhada43percentincreasedriskofdying.Butthatwasonlytrueforthepeoplewhoalsobelievedthatstressisharmfulforyourhealth.Peoplewhoexperiencedalotofstressbutdidnotviewstressasharmfulwerenomorelikelytodie.Infact,theyhadthelowestriskofdyingofanyoneinthestudyincludingpeoplewhohadrelativelylittlestress.Nowtheresearchersestimatedthatovertheeightyearstheyweretrackingdeaths182,000Americansdiedprematurely,notfromstress,butfromthebeliefthatstressisbadforyou.Thatisover20,000deathsayear.Now,ifthatestimateiscorrect,thatwouldmakebelievingstressisbadforyouthe15thlargestcauseofdeathintheUnitedStateslastyear,killingmorepeoplethanskincancer,HIV/AIDSandhomicide.Youcanseewhythisstudyfreakedmeout.HereI’vebeenspendingsomuchenergytellingpeoplestressisbadforyourhealth.Sothisstudygotmewondering:CanchanginghowyouthinkaboutstressmakeyouhealthierAndherethesciencesaysyes.Whenyouchangeyourmindaboutstress,youcanchangeyourbody’sresponsetostress.Nowtoexplainhowthisworks,Iwantyoualltopretendthatyouareparticipantsinastudydesignedtostressyouout.It’scalledthesocialstresstest.Youcomeintothelaboratory,andyou’retoldyouhavetogiveafive-minuteimpromptuspeechonyourpersonalweaknessestoapanelofexpertevaluatorssittingrightinfrontofyou,andtomakesureyoufeelthepressure,therearebrightlightsandacamerainyourface,kindoflikethis.Andtheevaluatorshavebeentrainedtogiveyoudiscouraging,non-verbalfeedbacklikethis.Nowthatyou’resufficientlydemoralized,timeforparttwoamathtest.Andunbeknownsttoyou,theexperimenterhasbeentrainedtoharassyouduringit.Nowwe’regoingtoalldothistogether.It’sgoingtobefun.Forme.Okay.Iwantyoualltocountbackwardsfrom996inincrementsofseven.You’regoingtodothisoutloudasfastasyoucan,startingwith996.Go!Gofaster.Fasterplease.You’regoingtooslow.Stop,stop,stop,stop.Thatguymadeamistake.Wearegoingtohavetostartalloveragain.You’renotverygoodatthis,areyouOkay,soyougettheidea.Now,ifyouwereactuallyinthisstudy,you’dprobablybealittlestressedout.Yourheartmightbepounding,youmightbebreathingfaster,maybebreakingoutintoasweat.Andnormally,weinterpretthesephysicalchangesasanxietyorsignsthatwearen’tcopingverywellwiththepressure.ButwhatifyouviewedtheminsteadassignsthatyourbodywasenergizedwaspreparingyoutomeetthischallengeNowthatisexactlywhatparticipantsweretoldinastudyconductedatHarvardUniversity.Beforetheywentthroughthesocialstresstest,theyweretaughttorethinktheirstressresponseashelpful.Thatpoundingheartispreparingyouforaction.Ifyou’rebreathingfaster,it’snoproblem.It’sgettingmoreoxygentoyourbrain.Andparticipantswholearnedtoviewthestressresponseashelpfulfortheirperformance,well,theywerelessstressedout,lessanxious,moreconfident,butthemostfascinatingfindingtomewashowtheirphysicalstressresponsechanged.Now,inatypicalstressresponse,yourheartrategoesupandyourbloodvesselsconstrictlikethis.Andthisisoneofthereasonsthatchronicstressissometimesassociatedwithcardiovasculardisease.It’snotreallyhealthytobeinthisstateallthetime.Butinthestudy,whenparticipantsviewedtheirstressresponseashelpfultheirbloodvesselsstayedrelaxedlikethis.Theirheartwasstillpounding,butthisisamuchhealthiercardiovascularprofile.Itactuallylooksalotlikewhathappensinmomentsofjoyandcourage.Overalifetimeofstressfulexperiences,thisonebiologicalchangecouldbethedifferencebetweenastressinducedheartattackatage50andlivingwellintoyour90s.Andthisisreallywhatthenewscienceofstressrevealsthathowyouthinkaboutstressmatters.Somygoalasahealthpsychologisthaschanged.Inolongerwanttogetridofyourstress.Iwanttomakeyoubetterasstress.Andwejustdidalittleintervention.Ifyouraisedyourhandandsaidyou’dhadalotofstressinthelastyear,wecouldhavesavedyoulife,becausehopefullythenexttimeyourheartispoundingfromstressyou’regoingtorememberthistalkandyou’regoingtothinktoyourselfthisismybodyhelpingmerisetothischallenge.Andwhenyouviewstressinthatway,yourbodybelievesyouandyourstressresponsebecomeshealthier.NowIsaidIhaveoveradecadeofdemonizingstresstoredeemmyselffrom,sowearegoingtodoonemoreintervention.Iwanttotellyouaboutoneofthemostunderappreciatedaspectsofthestressresponse,andtheideaisthis:Stressmakesyousocial.Tounderstandthissideodstress,weneedtotalkaboutahormone,oxytocin,andIknowoxytocinhasalreadygottenasmuchhypeasahormonecanget.Itevenhasitsowncutenickname,thecuddlehormone,becauseit’sreleasedwhenyouhugsomeone.Butthisisaverysmallpartofwhatoxytocinisinvolvedin.Oxytocinisneuro-hormone.Itfine-tunesyourbrain’ssocialinstincts.Itprimesyoutodothingsthatstrengthencloserelationships.Oxytocinmakesyoucravephysicalcontactwithyourfriendsandfamily.Itenhancesyourempathy.Itevenmakesyoumorewillingtohelpandsupportthepeopleyoucareabout.Somepeoplehaveevensuggestedweshouldsnortoxytocintobecomemorecompassionateandcaring.Buthere’swhatmostpeopledon’tunderstandaboutoxytocin.It’sastresshormone.Yourpituitaryglandpumpsthisstuffoutaspartofthestressresponse.It’sasmuchapartofyourstressresponseastheadrenalinethatmakesyourheartpound.Andwhenoxytocinisreleasedinthestressresponseitismotivatingyoutoseeksupport.Yourbiologicalstressresponseisnudgingyoutotellsomeonehowyoufeelinsteadofbottlingitup.Yourstressresponsewantstomakesureyounoticewhensomeoneelseinyourlifestrugglingsothatyoucansupporteachother.Whenlifeisdifficult,yourstressresponsewantsyoutobesurroundedbypeoplewhocareaboutyou.Okay,sohowisknowingthissideofstressgoingtomakeyouhealthierWell,oxytocindoesn’tonlyactonyourbrain.Italsoactsonyourbodyandoneofitsmainrolesinyourbodyistoprotectyourcardiovascularsystemfromtheeffectsofstress.It’sanaturalanti-inflammatory.Italsohelpsyourbloodvesselsstayrelaxedduringstress.Butmyfavoriteeffectonthebodyisactuallyontheheart.Yourhearthasreceptorsforthishormoneandoxytocinhelpsheartcellsregenerateandhealfromanystress-induceddamage.Thisstresshormonestrengthensyourheartandthecoolthingisthatallofthesephysicalbenefitsofoxytocinareenhancedbysocialcontactandsocialsupport,sowhenyoureachouttoothersunderstresseithertoseeksupportorhelpsomeoneelse,youreleasemoreofthishormone,yourstressresponsebecomeshealthier,andyouactuallyrecoverfasterfromstress.Ifindthisamazing,thatyourstressresponsehasabuilt-inmechanismfrostressresilience,andthatmechanismishumanconnection.Iwanttofinishbytellingyouaboutonemorestudy.Andlistenup,becausethisstudycouldalsosavealife.Thisstudytrackedabout1,000adultsintheUnitedStates,andtheyrangedinagefrom34to93,andtheystartedthestudybyasking,“Howmuchstresshaveyouexperiencedinthelastyear”Theyalsoasked,“Howmuchtimehaveyouspenthelpingoutfriends,neighbors,peopleinyourcommunity”Andthentheyusedpublicrecordsforthenextfiveyearstofindoutwhodied.Okay,sothebadnewsfirst:Foreverymajorstressfullifeexperiencelikefinancialdifficultiesorfamilycrisisthatincreasedtheriskofdyingby30percent.But--andIhopeyouareexpectingabutbynow--butthatwasn’ttrueforeveryone.Peoplewhospenttimecaringforothersshowedabsolutelynostress-relatedincreaseindying.ZeroCaringcreatedresilience.Andsoweseeonceagainthattheharmfuleffectsofstressonyourhealtharenotinevitable.Howyouthinkandhowyouactcantransformyourexperienceofstress.Whenyouchoosetoviewyourstressresponseashelpfulyoucreatethebiologyofcourage.Andwhenyouchoosetoconnectwithothersunderstressyoucancreateresilience.NowIwouldn’tnecessarilyaskformorestressfulexperiencesinmylife,butthissciencehasgivenmeawholenewappreciationforstress.Stressgivesusaccesstoourhearts.Thecompassionateheartthatfindsjoyandmeaninginconnectingwithothers,andyes,yourpoundingphysicalheart,workingsohardtogiveyoustrengthandenergy,andwhenyouchoosetoviewstressinthisway,you’renotjustgettingbetteratstress,you’reactuallymakingaprettyprofoundstatement.You’resayingthatyoucantrustyourselftohandlelife’schallengesandyou’rerememberingthatyoudon’thavetofacethemalone.Thankyou.