新视角研究生英语一5 remote control

新视角研究生英语一5remotecontrol5remotecontrolRecentlytheWashingtonPostprintedanarticleexplaininghowtheappliancemanufacturersplantodriveconsumersinsane.Ofcoursetheydon'tsaytheywanttodriveusinsane.Whattheysaytheywanttodoishaveusliveinhomeswhere"allappliancesareontheInternet,sharinginformation"andapplianceswillbe"smarterthanmostoftheirowners."Forexample,thearticlestates,youcouldhaveahomewherethedishwasher"canbeturnedonfromtheoffice"andtherefrigerator"knowswhenit'soutofmilk"andthebathroomscaletransmitsyourweighttothegym."Ifranklywonderwhethertheappliancemanufacturers,withallduerespect,havebeensmokingcrack.Imean,didtheyeverstoptoaskthemselveswhyaconsumer,afterloadingadishwasher,wouldgototheofficetostartit?Wouldtherebesomekindofcareerbenefit?YOURBOSS:Whatareyoudoing?',,'YOU(tappingcomputerkeyboard):I'mstartingmydishwasher!YOURBOSS:That'sthekindofproductivityweneedaroundhere!YOU:NowI'mflushingtheupstairstoilet!Listen,appliancemanufacturers:Wedon'tneedadishwasherthatwecancommunicatewithfromafar.Ifyouwanttoimproveourdishwashers,giveusonethatsenseswhenpeopleleavedirtydishesonthekitchencounter,andshoutsatthem:"PutthosedishesinthedishwasherrightnoworI'llleakall1overyourshoes!"Likewise,wedon'tneedarefrigeratorthatknowswhenit'soutofmilk.Wealreadyhaveafoolproofsystemfordeterminingifwe’reoutofmilk:weaskourlife.WhatwecoulduseisarefrigeratorthatrefusestoletusopenitsdoorwhenitsensesthatweareabouttoconsumeourfourthJell-OPuddingSnackintwohours.Asforascalethattransmitsourweighttothegym:Aretheynuts?Wedon't'wantourweighttransmittedtoourowneyeballs!WhatifthegymdecidedtotransmitourweighttoalltheseotherappliancesontheInternet?Whatif,Godforbid,ourrefrigeratorfoundoutwhatourweightwas!We'dnevergetthedooropenagain!Buthereiswhatreallyconcernsmeaboutthesenew"smart"appliances:Evenifwelikethefeatures,wewon'tbeabletousethem.Wecan'tusetheappliancefeatureswehavenow.Ihaveafeature-packedtelephonewith43buttons,atleast20ofwhichIamafraidtotouch.Thisphoneprobablycancommunicatewiththedead,butIdon'tknowhowtooperateit,justasIdon'tknowhowtooperatemyTV,whichrequiresthreeremotecontrols.Onecontrol(44buttons)camewiththeTV;asecond(39buttons)camewiththeVCR;thethird(37buttons)wasbroughtherebythecableman,whoapparentlyfeltthatIdidnothaveenoughbuttons.SowhenIwanttowatchTV,I'mconfrontedwithatotalof120buttons,identifiedbysuchhelpfullabelsasPIP,MTS,DBS,FZ,JUMPandBLANK.TherearethreebuttonslabeledPOWER,buttherearetimes---especiallyifmysonandhisfriends,whoarenotafraidoffeatures,havechangedthesettingswhenIhonestlycannotfigureouthowtoturntheTVon.Istandthere,holdingthreeremotecontrols,pressingbuttonsatrandom,untileventuallyIgiveupandgoturnonthedishwasher.Ithasbeen,literally,yearssinceIhavesuccessfullyrecordedaTVshow.Thatishow"smart"myapplianceshavebecome.Andnowtheappliancemanufacturerswanttogiveusevenmorefeatures.Doyouknowwhatthismeans?Itmeansthatsomenightyou'llopenthedoorofyour"smart"refrigerator,lookingforabeer,andyou'llhearapleasantcheerfulvoice-recordedbythesamewomanwhoinformsyouthatYourCallIsImportantwhenyoucallabusinessthatdoesnotwishtospeakwithyoupersonally-tellingyou:"Yourceleryislimp."Youwillnotknowhowyourrefrigeratorknowsthis,and,whatisworse,youwillnotknowwhoelseyourrefrigeratoristellingaboutit("Hey,Bob!Ihearyourceleryislimp!").And,ifyouwanttotrytomaketherefrigeratorstop,you'llhavetodecipherOwner'sManualinstructionswrittenbyandfornuclearphysicists("TodisabletheProduceCrispnessMonitoringfeature,entertheCommandMode,thenelecttheEditfunction,thenselectChangeVegetableDefaults,thenassumethatTrainAleavesChicagotravelingwestboundat47mph,whileTrainB...").Isthisthekindoffutureyouwant,consumers?Doyouwantappliancesthataresmarterthanyou?Ofcoursenot.Yourappliancesshouldbedumberthanyou,justlikeyourfurniture,yourpetsandyourrepresentativesinCongress.So,Iamurgingyoutolettheapplianceindustryknow,byphone,letter,faxande-mail,thatwhenitcomesto"smart"appliances,youvoteNO.Youneedtoactquickly.Becausewhileyou'rereadingthis,yourmicrowaveovenisvotingYES.